Hi guys, just wanted an update on how I've been doing
Life has been very chaotic for me-also very hard. While I do love my art school, the work is really demanding and stressful and it takes a ton of energy out of me (so if you see no work or poorly done pieces, you know what's up)
My family is also preparing to sell our house so we can move. We're not moving out of state-just closer into the city so we'll be closer to bus stops and our respective work and schools. Some of the houses we're looking at have options for me to be able to WALK to school. It would mean I don't have to get up so early, which would be great-I'm sooo tired of getting up at 6:30 and it's making me feel awful.
Speaking of me feeling awful...I'm not doing the best mental health wise. I was doing better then the past few months in January, but February's been super rough on me and I've been feeling awful and I've also cried in class a few times because I just felt soooo bad (It was really embarrassing...) I think my problems seem to be related around school stress, lack of sleep, me running into things that bother me constantly, and also the fact that these problems have been going on for four months now. It's VERY discouraging. I'm also starting to feel both depression AND anxiety, and the two of them together is a terrible combo.
Luckily, I will be put on medication soon to get it under control. I think I will start to really improve once I start having more better days. It won't be perfect straight away and I might need to switch meds up if one doesn't work, but it will be better then nothing and it will be better then me crying on the floor because my anxiety has gotten to the point where it's physically painful ;w; I HAVE noticed that my mental well being is tied to how long I can keep myself feeling better-if I have a string of good days, it's easier to handle and I feel better, but if I get a string of bad days, that's when it becomes awful because I spend a good chunk of it beating myself up internally for it.
AHHHH THAT'S ENOUGH OF THAT. Sorry, I really don't like to talk about my mental well being here much anymore because I tend to find looking back it makes me feel bad
But I am looking forward to things picking up! The week after next will be spring break for me so I may try and make some time for art or something if I can-maybe even a stream if i can get my old stuff downloaded again.
Either way, I hope you guys have a good weekend! ^^